We all want those days when everything comes together. When we feel good, perform good, and even the things outside of our control come together, to bring us the outcome we want. Those are the days and performances we strive for, and reward us for the hard work. However, those days are often less frequent and less important than the days where it is more challenging, and we have to dig deep.
It is our "bad" days that test our skill sets, make us dig deep, figure out what we are good at and the areas we still need to improve upon. Now the "bad" days can become less frequent and less of a dip compared to the "good" days. That is also a goal and important to focus on. We learn the most from the difficult days, we gain the most from the difficult days, they are our best teachers and provide us with the most insight. If we are willing to take a look objectively and not let our emotions or expectations deflate us.
I put good and bad days above in quotations, because in one sense if we are being mindful and having a more neutral thought process and outlook on things, then there really are no good or bad, that is a view point. It is a judgement on what has occurred, but how do we know that something that seems "bad" in a moment doesn't turn out to be something good for us down the road?
Each moment, each performance, gives you an opportunity to grow and learn from. Pain usually is a good motivator which is why those days are often the best teachers. However, every day we can find things we did well, and want to continue to do, and things we want to improve on. It all comes down to how we look at it.
1. Be Mindful: As mentioned above try and be more mindful of a situation, and more neutral in your thinking of it. When we label something as good or bad we are judging that situation. It is what we make and take from each situation and the choice in how we want to respond that is important. We have a tendency to either over exaggerate something or brush it under the rug, and ignore it. Nothing is usually as bad as we feel it is in the moment. Same goes for feeling like something isn't worth addressing or sharing.
2. Be curious: This is so important and helps with being less judgmental of something. If we try to understand and be curious as to what happened, both when things go the way we want and when things don't, we remove the judgement, and are rather digging into trying to understand objectively what we can take to be better moving forward.
3. How do you know: Always good when you do start to judge something, and have very strong emotions and feelings around it, to ask yourself the question how do you know? How do you know this is "bad"? How do you know this is "good"? When we label things, we are judging it, and looking at a very small component of the big picture. You may have made mistakes, and not played up to your potential, but does that mean that situation was bad? If you learn from it, and make adjustments to be better down the road, then the situation helped with that. When you look at championship teams in sports, often they had to learn the hard lessons before they could win.
To your success,
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Kate Allgood Masters Sport Psychology (with distinction) Masters General Psychology (with distinction) Sports Hypnosis Certification Mindfulness Certification
TAIS Assessment Certified